Strange Pulse

Potty humor is huge in our house. Always has been.

When my youngest was small, about this age:

Or younger, I used to call him Sweet Pea. He always thought I was saying “sweet pee.” He would laugh and laugh.

When the kids were small, they did this farting game called Safety. Parents I’m sure you know the drill. Actually, I’ve forgotten how it works. But it’s something like this–if someone farts, everyone has to yell “safety!” and then if you don’t, you have to touch a doorknob, or someone who called “safety” can punch you. OK I’ve probably gotten that all wrong.

But what it meant for me was being in the grocery store with three small kids and all of them yelling “safety!” the entire time. “Safety!” “Safety!” “Safety!”

“Safety!” “Safety!” “Safety!”

“Safety!” “Safety!” “Safety!”

All day long. So embarrassing, these kids.

Their latest thing is to replace words in songs with “poop” or “pee.” They’ve learned this from their father, master of all things potty-humor. The other night they were singing “Bicycle Race” by Queen:

I want to eat my poopsicle
I want to eat it now
I want to eat my poopsicle…

The possibilities are endless. Believe me, I know.

You try it. You’ll see.

My brother posted this link to Nina Hagen on David Letterman on his blog. It was a bit mind-boggling for me. We must’ve had it recorded as teens because I remembered every word she said. Especially the part where she’s trying to explain that hair extensions are burned on, but all she can say is, “Fire….fire…”

(more…)

Aretha Franklin, of course!

A few years back, she was scheduled to appear on the Grammy’s. So was Pavarotti. He cancelled due to illness at the very last minute. The show’s producers scrambled around and ended up asking Aretha if she could stand in for him. She had 10 minutes to rehearse, and she had to sing the song in his key.

I’ve uploaded her performance to the radio.blog.

The Cure - The Blood
The Frames - The Blood

I’ve always loved this Cure song. But then I think this was the first Cure album I owned–I know I saw them on this tour. It’s where I met my husband for the first time–going to the show.

“Tell me who doesn’t love what can never come back?”

And the Frames are one of my fave bands. This version is from their live album, Set List, which really captures how great they are live. One of my favorite live bands, period:

There’s a meme going around a lot of blogs where you’re supposed to list 6 weird things about yourself. I have to say, most of what I’ve read people revealing about themselves is awfully tame. I actually find it weird that people are so unweird.

So, let me try. (Not that it’s a contest, or anything…)

1. I’m Mormon, and I love doom metal. Either of those two make me weird, right? Put them together, and you’ve got–WEIRD.

2. I enjoy feeling sad. Have ever since I was a kid. I used to mope around on the swingset in our backyard, making up sad songs about my oldest sister and how she had to be separated from her husband (because he was in prison). I used to wander down the street feeling sad and singing, “Feel-ings, nothing more than feel-ings…” WEIRD.

3.

WEIRD.

4. If I had the choice between living in Beverly Hills or living in an inner-city/poor/gang neighborhood, and neither choice would negatively affect my kids (or my income), I’d choose the gang area. WEIRD.

5. I’d rather give a speech/presentation/talk in front of a very large group of people than I would socialize with a group of people I’ve never met or don’t know very well. I hate socializing in groups. Which is why I have a problem with church activities and even Relief Society actvities/meetings. But I enjoy public speaking. Weird?

6. I talk to inanimate objects. I don’t think this is that weird, but it’s something I get weird looks over. But can I help it if the dishes need a little coaxing to get clean?

I’m sure I’ve left out all the really weird stuff, and my brothers will read this and say are you kidding? You’re weird because you love…well I can’t think of anything weirder than some of the stuff my brothers are into. So, if you want to continue the meme on your blog, have at it–just let me know. Or post your weirdness in the comments. And have fun with it.

Happy Easter!

In my family, Easter and Christmas were the two big family-gathering holidays. I miss that.

Remember when Easter egg hunts actually involved real eggs?

We’re having one of our single friends over for dinner tonight, although I’m still not sure what I’ll cook. Probably just throw something in the crock pot–I hate to cook.

I played Easter bunny this morning, which I don’t think I’ve ever done before–my parents would always buy my kids so much Easter candy, I never bothered to. Last year, they actually sent some in the mail! But this year I told them not to bother. So I went a bit overboard, I’m afraid. I even got Daniel a chocolate bunny so he wouldn’t be eating the kids’–which he does every year. They haven’t woken up yet.

It looked like a cloud. Actually, it looked like a jet trail that got blown into weird spirals or something.

California gets some weird clouds.

If you haven’t heard of it, go read Brian’s review here. It’s about Arthur Killer Kane, the bassist of the New York Dolls who converted to Mormonism later in life, and the band reuniting for a music festival in London.

I ordered it from Amazon as soon as I heard it was out and watched it the same day it came in the mail. It’s really good. Makes me wish I could’ve known him before he died.

You know that episode of Spongebob where he and Patrick are eating lollipops, and Patrick gobbles his down so fast, he doesn’t remember eating it? And he immediately accuses Spongebob of stealing his lollipop. Spongebob tells him no, you just ate yours really fast, this is mine, and they all laugh, even Patrick. But then Patrick insists, “You stole my lollipop!”

We were all laughing about that episode one day while eating dinner at a small Mexican place near our house. And Elijah was eating a churro. He gobbled it down really fast and couldn’t remember eating it, and immediately, and completely seriously, accused his brother of stealing his churro. (His brother didn’t have one, only Elijah had ordered one.) “You took my churro!”

We told him no one had taken his churro, and then we all laughed because it was exactly like the Spongebob episode we had just discussed. Even Elijah was rolling. But then as soon as the laughter died away, Elijah was mad again. “But who took my churro? Someone stole my churro!”

Just. Like. Patrick.

We were eating out again last night and someone brought up Spongebob. Then I was trying to recall the episode with the lollipop, and we all remembered how Elijah had accused us all of stealing his churro. We were all laughing, including Elijah. But as soon as the laughter died down there came the completely serious and still ticked-off, “You took my churro!”

Belle & Sebastian - Beautiful
India.Arie - Beautiful
Carole King - Beautiful

I love all these songs.